Tick Tock Timesavers

E1

This week's featured item is 'World of Me', a hat with a photo of your face dangling from it to remind your loved ones of you for as long as they wear it.

For The One You Love

E2

This week's featured item is 'The Snooze-a-nator', a stun gun which knocks users unconscious for 15 seconds, giving the effect of eight hours' normal sleep. However, the side-effect of overuse is that it can turn users a bit racist.

Caviar and Platinum

E3

Do you want to eat like the landed gentry? Then try a tin of 'Fox Chunks in Paupers' Tears'. Fancy a holiday with a difference? Try 'Dictate-a-Break' and become the tyrant of a banana republic for a fortnight.

Women's Things

E4

This week's featured product is 'Lest-We-Forgetti' - swastika shaped pasta shapes to ensure that the Nazi occupation and the penalty shoot-out from Euro 96 are never far from one's thoughts.

Men Only

E5

This week's featured product is 'Chunky Chunky Rope' - lengths of chunky fat rope for men to carry around and emphasise their heterosexuality.

P-Leisure: Pleasure and Leisure

E6

This week's featured product is 'A Piece of Nixon' - an actual portion of the ex-president, sliced off his body and presented in a unique Tupperware presentation holder

Table for One

E7

This week's featured item is 'My Partner The Jar' - a jar containing a pickled rabbit's foetus which makes the ideal companion for those lonely people who never get invited to dinner parties.

Youngovations

E8

This week's featured item is 'Babystasis', a see-through plastic backpack aimed at teenage mums, which allows you to place your baby in suspended animation until you are old enough to cope with it.

Good Parenting

E9

This week's featured item is 'My First Screwdriver Fight', the kit that every child should own.

Home Tech Hi-Tech

E10

This week's featured item is 'Sherlock Golden Robot', a robot you can send around to the house of a neighbour you suspect of committing a crime to confront them.